And I smile to myself because I see just how far I have come (: (: (: 

Done with the first week of A levels and I must say it has been some time since I felt this good about my academics. I don't know how I will do, even do I am really praying for my As but I know, this time, I have no regrets. The best has been invested and I personally feel that I haven't shortchanged myself, my parents and the people who have stood by me this whole time. 

I know it is still rather early for a self reflective post, but there is this pressing need in me to say some things haha. I feel really blessed and am really thankful that that baggage I carried is no longer around. I still wish certain things didn't have to happen the way they did, but at the same time, there is this larger part of me that is glad that it did, because without 'that' and this year as huge learning experiences, would I be the way I am today? 

Something that really touched me this year was the myriad of friends who texted me, wishing me all the best for A's, and I am honestly really pleasantly surprised. Yes, pretty heartwarming to know that even though we have not been in constant contact you guys still remember me and what I'm going through <3 I guess you can call me a sentimental 'fool', for the lack of a better word at this present moment, but hey, it's the small things that really matter (: 

How do I put this, yes I am stressed. Yet, I feel peaceful. And it is strange in this comforting way. I remembered entering the hall last year for International History freaking out, feeling the information seeping slowly out of my head even before I could find my place in the hall but it is really different this year and once again I know I have God to thank because without Him, I am really pretty certain that I would not have been able to get through this the way I did (: 

Do I sound really jaded? I hope I don't because I don't think I am, fine, I am not hahaha. Have been in this contemplative mood the entire day haha. 

On something of an entirely different proportion, there is something really boggling me. 

I do not know where everything is going and it scares me. Not you, but this whole situation. The problem is I can't shut you out because the connection we have is undeniable and just pretty amazing. Truth be told, I am really thankful for you bothering to cheer me up especially when I was feeling so terrible haha. But getting over something does not equate to being able enough to venture into new ground and the idea of being vulnerable, trusting someone with a part of me honestly does scare me. Like you said, I have trust issues, haha and even though I know you were completely kidding, you have no idea how right you were. 

But then again with A's looming precariously over me, these thoughts will have to take a backseat. Enjoy what we have right now and progress as life leads. This year will be a year of rights and I am going to be certain of that <3

While I mug hard for ECONS (Please pray for me), Lit and SEA History, all you Uni kids out there play as much as you can, because when I am done, and you're having finals (hahahahaha) the town is going to be painted oh so red ;) Have a good weekend lovers, X